9. Golf

11 04 2010

Believe it or not, Marcy Projects do not have a golf course.  Jay was able to escape this wack ass game for a solid 30+ years of his life.  He had a good run.  But let’s face facts, Jigga is going for mogul, and moguls play golf.  I mean to move on to the next one, it involves doing biz with a lot of old ass white dudes.  You know why Bill Gates and Donald Trump won’t let Nelly in(a)?  It’s because he fucking sucks at golf.  It’s frustrating playing with someone who sucks, and therefore all aspiring titans of industry need to learn the game.

Mr. Carter recently joined a country club and the dude had more shanks in his first round then fight night in prison.  He was trying to catch some lessons from Tiger but then Mr. Woods revealed that  bitches are like 20 of his problems, and Jay don’t get down like that.  His next plan is to get one of those electronic driving ranges in his jet, for practice during turbulence free times.

Imagine him playing 18 with Bloomberg, Memph Bleek suggesting all the wrong clubs.  Tee off with a 6 iron?  Come on Bleek.  Luckily Jay is mad coordinated from all the shooting he used to have to do, so it shouldn’t take him too long to learn.  Fore!-tune 500.

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