7. Turbulence

31 03 2010

Scenario: You’re up in the air, flier than the rest of ‘em, when all of a sudden the plane starts shaking and dipping low like Christina Milian.  They call that shit turbulence and it’s scary as hell.  Now it’s been established that Jay flies a fucking lot, let’s just say he’s mentioned it once or twice.  Well as rich as he is Jay stays flying the same sky we do and that sky is not always calm.  Take the amount of times you’ve been in turbulence in your life, now multiply that number by 100.  That’s how many times Jay has been in turbulence, THIS YEAR!  He may be better than you in almost every way but best believe he can’t fly without a plane either.

Plus you know Big Homey’s always playing pool and shit like that on his plane; hanging out with the pilot.  So, when he hits turbulence, he not only has to return to his seat but he also has to stop recording in his airborne studio, or some similarly baller activity.  That is not only scary, but singlehandedly delayed BP3.  It’s hard to record an album when you spend half your time commuting via air.

Now when you start to think the planes going down you probably start thinking about your girl and your life and everything you would leave behind if this was the one.  Well your girl ain’t Beyonce and your life ain’t Jay’s.  As sad as you get thinking about leaving them, imagine what goes through Mr. Carter’s head.  Dude went from bricks to billboards!!  Young’s got a lot to lose.

So next time you are rocking the turbulence, remember that Jay is in that shit all the time.  Dude still gets nervous, but you know he survives and you probably will too.  His Louis Vuitton parachute gives him a little bit of an edge, but still.

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3 responses

31 03 2010
Jay Z Problem #7: Turbulence « The IIIrd World

[…] Plus you know Big Homey’s always playing pool and shit like that on his plane; hanging out with the pilot….read the rest! […]

1 04 2010
Salt

he went bricks to billboards, from grams to grammys, from O’s to opposite orphan annie…..you got a problem Jay….and its TURBULENCE

11 04 2010
9. Golf « The Enumerated Troubles of Jay-Z

[…] His next plan is to get one of those electronic driving ranges in his jet, for practice during turbulence free […]

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