4. The English System

12 03 2010

Now hold up.  I am not referring to the English language by any means.  If the English language was a city, Jay-Z would be a important elected official of that city.  Let’s say Mayor.  The guy is a lyrical genius and knows his way around the words we say.

What I’m referring to is the English System of Weights and Measures.  You know, pounds, inches, etc.  Now don’t get me wrong, Jay has adapted.  He can get around using it.  But it’s not native.  Why not you ask?  First of all, stop asking so many questions.  Second, it’s because Jay used to have a job that required a strong knowledge of the Metric system.

As you may have learned from any song he’s ever made, Jay-Z used to work as a street pharmaceutical rep.  He was straight slanging drugs maaaan.  Well you know they measure that shit in grams and kilos!!  Come on dun, you’ve seen Scarface!  Well imagine you’re a younger Jay-Z and you come up learning all that metric shit so you can slang crack rock ‘cuz you ain’t got a wicked jump shot.  Then you go to school through the eighty’s and all your teachers are telling you the US is going to adopt the Metric system anyway so you have to learn it.  Then BAM, you leave the game, find out your teachers where mad wrong, and all of a sudden are forced to function in society.

Remember when Jay got pulled over for doing fifty five in a fifty four?  Doesn’t that sound like a made up speed limit?  That’s because Jay is talking about kilometers per hour.  He still converts it to understand.  Why do you think he’s always hanging out with Coldplay and chillin in Europe?  You saw the ‘Blue Magic’ video when he was tossing around Euro’s!  I mean he still tells the doctor his measurements in kilo’s and meters.  Good thing Jay’s doctors are smart as shit!    Anyway, if you ever think you’ll become close friends with Mr. Carter in the future I suggest learning the conversions.  Be a pal.

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2 responses

12 03 2010
Mike

I often thought that Jay-z was doing the speed of 55 mph in a 54 mph zone. But then I changed. I got ma shit down and learned what your boy was sayin. He waznt doing no 55 in a 54 zone bitches. He was doin 55 in a 1954. or fidty fo if you feelin me.

3 06 2010
craze

@topic – THIS ONE WAS THE BEST / MOST CLEVER OF THE LAST 11. Good Job.

@Mike – Nah son… you’re overthinking it. He was doing 55 in a 55mph zone. There is no such thing, but it rhymed, it sounded hot and we all understood / got the point. That’s what Jay does. Well.

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